spaceship no future

September 2000

Plastic tubes and pots and pans, bits and pieces, bits and pieces

I read in Slashdot about a fascinating technology called 3D Printing that is finally going to make our miserable, unfulfilling lives worth living again. Whereas a conventional printer lays down ink on a flat paper using what is basically a 2D bitmap, a 3D printer starts with a 3D representation of an object, slices the model into horizontal layers, and then “prints” a physical, tangible object layer by layer. The “ink” used varies, but the most favored technology for mainstream application actually works like an inkjet printer, printing with…

cobra libre · September 28, 2000 · read

Why you should vote for Nader/LaDuke. And FLUFFY BUNNIES

Some of my sniveling liberal friends are simply aghast that I plan to vote for the Green Party. “A vote for Nader is a vote for Bush,” they say. To which I usually reply, “I hate you. Fuck you and your mother, you mimsy reformist sellout pantywaist. Also, fuck you.” In my more lucid moments, though, this is my response: If the Green Party gets 5% of the total votes this year, then next time around they qualify for beaucoup federal funds. If you live in a state where…

cobra libre · September 26, 2000 · read

FLUFFY BUNNIES

Who hasn’t fantasized at least once or twice of snuffing out the FLUFFY BUNNIES with a handheld rocket launcher? I know I have, and high tech American ingenuity will one day make that dream a reality. In the meantime, though, there’s Political Arena, a brilliant Quake III Arena mod that pits all four y2k Republicrat candidates against each other in a pitched battle to the death. Or capture the flag. Whatever. In a refreshing change of pace for the online game dork community, the web site really tells it like…

cobra libre · September 25, 2000 · read

even as we speak touring east coast in october

they’re touring in support of the cannanes, who are also great, and actually it’s mary dwyer with unknown others performing even as we speak songs (i assume, otherwise that’s pretty sneaky), but she was the original singer and they recorded one of the best pop albums of all time, feral pop frenzy (pictured). they’re australian, so chances are you won’t get to see them again, because i have it on good authority that the olympic games are going to end in a terrible war. got this news from the…

fhazel · September 23, 2000 · read

Your monitor will make you glow in the dark.

Or make you itchy and sneezy, at least. I just returned from a short trip to Surfside Beach, Texas, where a Dow chemical plant is only a mile from the beach and red tide was causing dead fish to wash up all over the shore. After a weekend of breathing napalm and neurotoxins, with only Lone Star beer to stave off the misery, I called in sick* to recover my lungs and finish up a computer game (Planescape: Torment - best game ever) I had been playing. Now, though, I’ve…

cobra libre · September 19, 2000 · read

mutant bunnies!

genetic engineering is scary and exciting, not unlike “genetic engineering” by OMD. actually “electricity” by OMD is better, but less scary and exciting because i take electricity for granted. anyway, glow in the dark bunny! eduardo kac, a wacky artist, convinced a french genetics lab to take some jellyfish genes and an albino rabbit and cook up a dish of bio-luminescent bunny. those french and their weird cuisine! but wait! this bunny isn’t for eating, it’s for loving and petting and playing. kac claims the infra-rabbit is transgenic art, but…

fhazel · September 18, 2000 · read

Chicken Soup for the Soul from Howard Phillips L.

The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the mind to correlate all its contents. We live on a placid island of ignorance in the midst of black seas of infinity, and it was not meant that we should voyage far. The sciences, each straining in its own direction, have hitherto harmed us little; but some day the piecing together of dissociated knowledge will open up such terrifying vistas of reality, and of our frightful position therein, that we shall either go mad from the…

doug · September 16, 2000 · read

baldur’s gate II: shadows of amn gone gold

should be out in a couple weeks. the limited edition (if everyone jumped off a bridge…) comes with a bonus disc containing extra items, characters, quests, etc. that’s real half-assed if you ask me. ask me. maybe they’ll announce a super-limited metal box edition with the limited edition install utility? special gold pre-release patch disk? 7” with non album tracks? i protested this elitist moneymaking scheme by pre-ordering a limited edition copy from interplay. be careful- the announcement about baldur’s gate II is easy to miss. i’m writing a big…

fhazel · September 15, 2000 · read

love conquers all. no, wait. love sues universal.

this story will be a disappointment after you make the grumpy cat dance, i mean, anything would, but give it a minute. as you all know, big record companies are evil, napster users are thieves, and everybody is suing everybody all the time everywhere, while spaceship no future remains totally blameless and innocent like a tiny kitten (see fig. 1). so i’ll just dive right in like you know exactly what i’m talking about and agree with me unreservedly. universal music group (big record company) sued mp3.com (cannonfodder for…

fhazel · September 15, 2000 · read

Best web site ever.

Please click here. Thank you….

cobra libre · September 15, 2000 · read

frank dux in the walled city

so i just watched bloodsport on TV, the movie about the secret contest where the world’s greatest warriors fight in a battle to the death. now i must find a suitable punishment for myself. i remember watching this movie when i was little. when ogre got punched by chong li, making yet another dark stain on the pristine white gym mats, my friend quietly murmured “black blood is brain blood… that’s serious” and from that point on, i vowed to never, ever get interested in martial arts. the only black…

fhazel · September 15, 2000 · read

ars technica reviews my lovely computer case

yeah, i’m bad, i was preaching about the casedge LX734A back when it was called the 3400T. to me it had the following advantages: it didn’t have that “god i need to stop using computers and get laid” faux-sexy curvy design like 99% of PC ATX cases have nowadays, it was easy to fool around inside of it, and it was dirt cheap if you didn’t buy it at jinco computing like i did. they finally reviewed it at ars technica and caesar came up with pretty much the…

fhazel · September 13, 2000 · read

MPAA, DeCSS, CMU Dr., &!, &!, &!… U R SOL

salon has a lovely interview with david touretzky about judge kaplan’s ruling in the MPAA vs. 2600 case. david touretzky has a gallery of CSS descramblers which aims to illustrate the absurdity of not affording source code first amendment protections. he gave a deposition in the case to that effect. the interview is short, illustrates the main problems with the judge’s ruling, and is a good jumping-off point for people who haven’t been the following the case. most americans won’t blink an eye when you tell them their rights…

fhazel · September 13, 2000 · read

you will be kodo, and you will be podo.

and this will be modo. it’s a PDA that helps you better participate in consumer culture or some damn thing. at least it doesn’t run on Windows CE. it doesn’t look like a ferret, and they don’t even mention marc singer one time on the whole damn website. which looks like a flyer for some rave sponsored by wired. i give you a nice table for comparison: modo vs. podo/kodo modo (PDA device)*odo (ferret) portableambulatory sleek, hand-heldsleek, hand-held wirelesswireless odorlessmusky updated with fresh inspiration dailyneeds feeding daily despite the numerous…

fhazel · September 06, 2000 · read

hey, we’re not arguing*

dad showed me an interview with ray bradbury that was in the paper today, by roger moore of the orlando sentinel. ray is a noted sci-fi author of such books as farenheit 451, #275 on the internet top 100 SF/fantasy list and oft referred to in hushed tones on the slashdot forums. we’ll just let ray speak for himself:(on the internet) “this thing is bound to fail. napster’s out there, stealing everyone blind. they’re stealing people’s work. they should be put in jail. all of them. all this electronic stuff…

fhazel · September 02, 2000 · read

new moose album available in US!

i’m voting for this album in the upcoming presidential election. it’s called high ball me! and it’s been available in england for a while (which is where i got it), but i just noticed in the latest parasol update it’s available in the US now. james reeder’s lovely moose page notes it is also available from darla. get yourself on napster and listen to “can’t get enough of you” or “wonder where i’ll go.” this album grabbed my heart and squoze it. it even makes robots cry it’s so…

fhazel · September 01, 2000 · read

You are all assholes. I hate you.

I am a Nietzschean superman with a highly evolved ethical facility that effectively absolves me of the need to resolve the personal and intrapersonal moral contradictions that the rest of you sheep grapple with daily. For instance: A) I believe in the sanctity of all human life. And kittens. But B) Old people are useless. Also: A) When the U.S. bombed a major pharmaceutical plant in Sudan for no real reason, I was saddened and dismayed. Pissed off, even. But B) I like to shoot people between the eyes with…

cobra libre · September 01, 2000 · read